Study of the Day: Women Are Much Happier When Men Feel Their Pain

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According to recent research, men and women derive satisfaction from their partner's ability to empathize in vastly different ways.

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PROBLEM: How do men and women in relationships value their significant other's ability to empathize?

 

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METHODOLOGY: Researchers led by Harvard Medical School's Shiri Cohen recruited 156 heterosexual couples and recorded statements from each participant about a recent incident with his or her partner that was particularly frustrating, disappointing, or upsetting. Then, after reuniting the couples and playing back the statements, they videotaped the pairs for 10 minutes as they tried to come to a better understanding of their problems.

Following the discussions, the subjects watched the videotape and simultaneously rated their negative and positive emotions throughout. Using these ratings, the authors selected and showed the most emotionally charged clips to the participants and had them complete questionnaires about their sentiments during each segment. They also measured the participants' overall satisfaction with their relationships as well as their perceptions of their partner's feelings.

RESULTS: Relationship satisfaction among the men was tied to their ability to read their partner's positive emotions accurately. The women's happiness in their romances, on the other hand, was associated with their partner's ability to correctly read their negative emotions.

CONCLUSION: Men like to know when their wife or girlfriend is happy while women really want the man in their life to know when they are not. Cohen explains in a statement: "It could be that for women, seeing that their male partner is upset reflects some degree of the man's investment and emotional engagement in the relationship, even during difficult times."

SOURCE: The full study, "Eye of the Beholder: The Individual and Dyadic Contributions of Empathic Accuracy and Perceived Empathic Effort to Relationship Satisfaction" (PDF), is published in the Journal of Family Psychology.

via theatlantic.com

Thank you for visiting my blog. Jim

Jim Woods is president and founder of InnoThink Group. A global management consulting firms specialized solely in helping organizations of all sizes in all industries catalyzing top line growth through strategic innovation and hypercompetition. Jim has over 25 years consulting experience in working with small, mid size and Fortune 1000 companies. He is a former U.S. Navy Seabee and grandfather of five. Jim is board president of a charter school located in Colorado Springs whose sole purpose is to prepare otherwise disadvantaged students more competitively for college. To arrange for Jim to speak at your next event or devise an effective hypercompetition strategy email or call us at 719-649-4118 for availability. Subscribe to our innovation and hypercompetition newsletter.   

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Jack Canfield: ‘You are going to be successful in spite of a recession' - Money - DNA

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 We have a lot of control over our future, says Jack Canfield, American motivational speaker and author of the mass-selling Chicken Soup for the Soul series. Canfield is slated to address what will likely be sellout seminars in Mumbai and Bangalore on April 12 and 14, respectively. Known as much for his philosophy as his business acumen, Canfield has been courted by major Indian corporates over the years. In fact, some invite him to deliver motivational talks for their staff, in a bid to boost productivity, morale and relations. In thisinterview with Priyanka Golikeri, Canfield says it’s more important to implement what you read than mere reading of books:

Q: What do you know about the India publishing market with reference to Chicken Soup for the Soul?
A: India has been a country that has sold millions of the Chicken Soup books and now created its own series of Chicken Soup for the Indian Soul books. I had not foreseen that there would be a book such as the Chicken Soup for the Indian Soul. The country has given us a fantastic response.

Q: What kind of inspiration does India as a country provide for the book? Which other India-focused books are likely to come out soon?
A: I have visited India twice before and have travelled to Mumbai, Delhi and Chennai.There is an excitement and aliveness in India that I rarely feel in other places in the world.I love the diverse cultures, the smells, the food, the art, the music, the history, the architecture, the spiritual traditions, the busyness and industriousness in the cities and the peacefulness and beauty in the spiritual centres, ashrams and mosques.

What may appear chaotic and overwhelming to many visitors has always felt uplifting and exciting to me. I feel very much at home in India, and I always leave motivated, enriched and enlightened.
To answer the second part of your question, well, after 225 titles in the Chicken Soup for the Soul series, we’ve covered a lot of topics.What we are now focusing on are smaller niches within categories that we’ve already written about.

For example, the first book for women was Chicken Soup for the Woman’s Soul, but since then, we’ve done Chicken Soup for the Working Woman’s Soul, Chicken Soup for the Mother’s Soul, and so on.There are many niches to explore within that one category.
The same is true for sports. We’ve done Sports Fan’s Soul, Baseball Lover’s Soul, Golfer’s Soul, but that still leaves many sports to cover.We are now beginning to do a series of books around the world within specific countries. For example, we did Chicken Soup for the Indian Soul, the Indian Woman’s Soul, and the Indian Armed Forces’ Soul, and we’ll continue to keep doing that as long as there are stories to be told.

Q: Is the series looking at introducing more books for young adults, children below 12, working professionals, so on?
A: I haven’t quite decided what my next few books are going to be but yes some books that have been recently launched are the Chicken Soup for the Soul: Messages from Heaven, Chicken Soup for the Soul: Tough Times for Teens, Chicken Soup for the Soul: Food and Love and Chicken Soup for the Soul for Grandmothers.

Q: When it comes to motivation and inspiration, do Indians look more towards spiritual and religious gurus? Is religion necessary for motivation?
A: Religion is not a prerequisite for motivation. However, spirituality could be useful and a positive influencer. For me, spirituality comes from meditation. I think as you meditate over the years, you evolve — your practice gets deeper, and you reach new levels of inner peace and awareness.

Q: How encouraging are Indian corporates towards motivational talks? To what extent do such discourses help in enhancing productivity of employees and in their personal lives?
A: Indian corporates have had an encouraging point of view when it comes to motivational talks. In the past, I have visited India, sponsored by corporates such as Dr PrathapReddy’s Apollo Hospitals group, for talks and coaching.

First of all, just attending courses and being hopeful is not a good strategy, and reading self- help books will not transform your life.Only applying and putting into action what you read will.Many people spend the majority of their lives studying and thinking about success, meditating and visualising, but not taking the actions that are needed to create that success.

So learning from other people’s experiences and insights is an important part of the journey toward achieving your goals, but it is only the first part. It is the discipline and daily application of those principles, strategies and techniques applied consistently over time, combined with perseverance and never giving up, that ultimately produce breakthroughs and success in life.

I myself have read over 3,000 books, attended more than 300 seminars and listened to hundreds of hours of audio programmes so I know the value of learning valuable principles and techniques from others.But if I had to give myself credit for anything, it’s that I consistently put into action what I learned.
Another thing that is important to understand is that while there are universal and ageless principles like taking 100% responsibility for your life, setting specific measurable goals, et cetera, many of the specific techniques for success constantly change over time. For example, what used to work in marketing and sales ten years ago may not work the same way today.

 

via dnaindia.com